The End Is Coming Soon

This is just RIDICULOUS. Cricket Ganesha? Are you kidding me? for people who don't understand Hindi - you people are blessed. Trust us. The chanting during the morning puja goes thus:

Om Boundary marne wala-ya namah
Om Sixer marne wala-ya namah
Om All rounder-aayah namah
Om Wicket lene waal-ya namah
Om Wicket keep karne wala-ya namah

The genius who invented this new deity (like we needed more) is Mr. Ramakrishnan. This is how Cricket Ganesha came into being:

"It was March 11, 2001. The second Test match between India and Australia was going on at Kolkata. India was in a very bad situation. It so happened that Ramakrishnan had installed a statue of Lord Ganesha in an obscure corner of his apartment complex. He went down and prayed to Ganesha, 'If you are really powerful, let India win the match.' Soon after that, Harbhajan Singh took a hat-trick. Though India was asked to follow on, it made a huge total of more than 600 runs. Laxman made 281, and Rahul Dravid scored 180. Harbhajan took 13 wickets in the match and India won the Test match!"

What conceit to think that God has nothing better to do other than to see your favorite team win. What about the other team? Did those poor sods not pray enough? or did they just pray to the wrong God?

Mr. Ramakrishnan, since your prayers are being answered, how about praying for world peace instead of a stupid cricket match? Fucking moron.

Sachin Tendulkar is becoming a comic superhero called 'Sachin the Master Blaster'. All superheroes need a kick ass weapon. That much is canon. What is Sachin's weapon? Any guesses? The press release was silent about that part. It can't be a cricket bat, can it? Nobody is that stupid, right? In this series, 'Sachin the Master Blaster' will run around hitting the baddies with a cricket bat whilst chanting the Cricket Ganesha mantras.

Just Kill Us Now.